3 ideas
Ban Zhao argues from inside the logic of wifely duty: a husband who is not worthy cannot control his wife, and a wife who is not worthy cannot serve her husband, so both roles depend on training. Since boys are taught to read from age eight, it is inconsistent to leave girls untaught when their duties require the same cultivation. She uses the premise of submission to argue for female literacy.
Womanly excellence is split into four attainable domains: virtue (modesty and self-restraint), speech (choosing words and speaking at the right time), appearance (cleanliness, not beauty), and work (diligent spinning and preparing food for guests). She insists none of these requires brilliance, eloquence, or striking looks. Anyone who keeps them in mind can achieve them, so the standard is set by consistent practice rather than natural gifts.
A new wife's standing with her husband's parents depends on how her husband's younger brothers and sisters regard her, because they shape what the parents hear and believe. Winning their affection through humility and yielding creates allies who spread her praise. Alienating them multiplies accusations even when she is in the right. Household security is treated as a problem of managing the informal network around the authority figures, not the authority figures directly.